MASCOT Family Role


class clown 

IF I’M ENTERTAINING ENOUGH –
they won’t feel the pain!

PREVIOUS: Lost Child Role

SITE: Mascot: Not all Fun & Games

❧ MASCOT
GOAL
Provide diversion from the family’s problems & making everyone feel better with their comedy & zaniness

PURPOSE
For Family:  They are genuinely ‘immature’ but play that up to draw attention away from the scary adults. Use comic relief to lighten the ‘heavy’ atmosphere, cover up the depth of the family sickness by keeping the focus on themselves & create a diversion to diffuse volatile situations. They take responsibility for the family’s emotional well-being & become its ‘social director’.
• Can actually hinder Recovery while using humor to communicate awarenesad clownss of the dysfunction rather than address it head on, & to indirectly express emotions in the family such as anger, grief, hostility or fear by satire, sarcasm, teasing….
For Self: feel scared & powerless in the middle of the family mess & try to interrupt physical & emotional tension & danger to protect themselves

BIRTH ORDER:  Usually the youngest, but not always

IN SCHOOL
Class clown or cut-up, admired by classmates for making school enjoyable.
Are hyper-active, have difficulty concentrating on studies, so may develop learning deficits, & conclude they’re not intelligent (which is not true)

FAMILY TREATMENT
Assumed to be happy-go-lucky but not smart or capable, are the ones everybody in the family loves & prefers, may be seen as fragile, so over-protected & shielded from life’s problems

ACTIONS /STYLE
Personal: They spend little time at home. Have lots of friends, a short attention span & inappropriate emotional responses (laugh when things are serious or painful). Avoid angry confrontations, go “with the flow”; disown responsibility, attract constant attention, are silly childexaggerated & dramatic, hyper-energetic, disruptive, may get into trouble but not the malicious kind like the Scapegoat does
• Social: They can make obnoxious jokes about the family by using inappropriate humor to indicate their own repressed anger. Use fun to amuse their circle of friends but are not taken seriously & may be subjected to criticism & rejection for being silly & flaky

DEFENSES
Exaggerate immaturity, being super-cute, acting dumb, making fun of self, doing anything to get attention – clowning, humor, becoming an actor, addictions

DEFICITS
Attention seeking, distracting to others, stay immature, difficulty focusing, poor decision-making ability, superficial, ‘in the dark’. Fearful of looking inside & being honestly about feelings & behavior, so will be out of touch with ‘unpleasant’ emotions and their spirituality

BELIEFS
mascot dancerFrom: “I must never point out any problems”
“ If I make people laugh, everyone will feel better”
“ I only have value as an entertainer”

To: “I have value for who I am, without being amusing”
“I can be comforted & loved even when I’m not ON”
“ I’m not responsible for others’ happiness”

EMOTIONS
Terrified, lonely, embarrassed, sad, anxious, deeply insecure, S-H, inadequate &  unimportant – show shame with depression & addiction

COST TO SELF
• Rarely feels loved for themselves, but rather for playing this role and keeping the family entertained.  Not allowed to have sadness or any other painful emotions.  ALSO not allowed to be clever, functional, show what they can accomplish in a serious way. They ignore all suffering, which may later show up as illness, & deny the right to know their True Self.
• Their frenetic social activity is often a defense against intense inner anxiety & tension. Their inability to cope with that stress can leads them to believe they’re going crazy. If this is not addressed, they can slip into addiction, mental illness or committing suicide

PARENTS CAN HELP CHILD
TO:  express humor appropriately, learn to take care of self, manage need for attention, find ways to be competent
BY: Be consistent & firm; do not push, only remind, & reward by using natural & logical consequences to their actions, DO NOT reinforce sick, sadistic or self-deprecating humor with laughter

Adult RECOVERY NEEDS
To take responsibility, risk being serious and to be taken seriously, learn assertiveness, study something in-depth, feel all emotionsgood host

STRENGTHS
With help: Valued for their kind heart, generosity & ability to listen.
They’re charming people, entertaining hosts, have a good sense of humor, know how to play & enjoy, quick-witted & witty, joyful & bring joy to others, flexible, independent, helpful

NEXT: Satir’s BLAMER Role

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2 thoughts on “MASCOT Family Role

  1. What does “S-H” stand for? I’ve looked over other articles and cannot find what it means. Thanks in advance!

    • Hi.Thanks for asking.
      It means ‘self-hate’. All abbreviations are on the ACRONYM page – click on that word at the top of each page.

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