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REVIEW: Ways to express anger – Bible perspective
✏️What are you trying to achieve, accomplish, or prove with the silent treatment?
✏️What are you trying to protect yourself from by choosing silence?
✏️Is this a defensive tactic? If Yes, then against what?
✏️What are you trying to control when you use the silent treatment?
✏️What are you afraid of if you were to actually talk to the person you’re ignoring? ✏️What is it that makes you so angry?
🔎Are you aware how this tactic affects your family—the infliction of abuse?
🔎Are there any other people in your life you treat this way?
🔎How does it make you feel when you are ignored and alienated?
🔎Do you have anyone holding you accountable for this tactic?
🔎Will you change now? Will you stop doing this?
QUESTIONNAIRE re. being Passive-Aggressive
Unexpressed anger can build up and take over your life, making you miserable in many different ways. You may have deep unresolved anger if you:
_____ Deny your feelings of frustration, irritation and impatience
_____ Are afraid to express strong emotion, believing it’s wrong to be angry
_____You appear sweet, compliant and agreeable, but are really resentful, angry, petty and envious underneath
_____You cover up feeling inadequate with superiority, disdain, hostile passivity
_____ Frequently vent injustice about your job or home situation to others
_____Smile but are bitter and cynical, while you are hurting inside
_____ Are excessively impatient and irritable
_____ Are bored, apathetic, have lost interest in things you used to enjoy
_____ Become easily frustrated with other people’s faults
_____You’re afraid of being alone, & equally afraid of being dependent
_____You sulk, withdraw and pout
_____You constantly protect yourself so no one will know how afraid you are of being inadequate, imperfect, left, dependent or simply human
MENTAL / PHYSICAL
_____ Are unnecessarily critical of yourself
_____ Turn your anger on yourself and beat yourself up
_____You complain frequently that you’re treated unfairly
_____ You procrastinate frequently, especially on things you do for others
_____You are often late and/or forgetful
_____Express disbelief at others’ driving, resulting in road rage
_____ Have continual thoughts of revenge
_____ Grind teeth or clench your jaws; chronic muscle tension in your face
_____ Chronic muscle tension in neck & shoulders, that worsens when upset
_____ Habitually clenched fists, tap feet or hands when upset
COMMUNICATION / SOCIAL
_____ Are afraid to express your opinion because you might blow up
_____ Overly polite, cheerful, ‘grin & bear it’ to hide feelings of injustice
_____ Agree to do something, then don’t follow through. “Forget” your promises
_____ Want to be known as the “nice guy/gal” but inwardly are in turmoil
_____ Are sarcastic and use humor destructively
_____ Frequently pepper your talk with cuss words
_____ Must have the last work in a disagreement, keeping a fight going
_____ Pick at others & provoke them to anger
_____ Are secretly or outwardly judgmental about the actions of others
_____ Displace anger on safer people (less threatening) or on objects
_____You’re unwilling to give a straight answer
_____ You make up stories, excuses and lies
_____You drag your feet to frustrate others
____ You don’t speak your truth openly, kindly and honestly when asked for your opinion or when asked to do something for someone
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