Alcoholism – INTRO (#1b)


PREVIOUS: Alcoholism INTRO #1a

SITE: Behavioral Addiction (many articles)

• trouble seeing themselves as alcoholic because they’re successful , & not on Skid Row
• use alcohol as stress-relief & a reward
• have few tangible negative consequences from drinking, often by sheer luck

Professional Life
• keep consistent employment, well respected for job performance
• have a good education
, with academic accomplishments
• make artistic, social or political contributions

• externally seem to be managing life well
• maintain family &/or romantic relationships & friendships
• skilled at compartmentalizing (separate professional & drinking lives)
• usually have one or more co-dependent helpers covering for them

Drinking Habits 
• one alcoholic drink sets off a craving, obsessed about next drink
• obvious personality changes, compromise morals when intoxicated
• repeat unwanted drinking patterns & self-destructive behaviors

SITE: ” The Cure for High-Functioning Alcoholism

a. Problems – external stressors & internal emotional pain causing anxiety 
b. Fantasize – about using something for relief of symptoms
c. Obsession –
about how using a substance will make life better 
d. Actively using – engage in addictive activity
e. Frustration – dissatisfied that relief doesn’t last
f. Addiction  –
lose control over substance use
g. Shame – feelings of remorse & guilt re. bad behaviors
h. Promises –
to self (& others), resolves to stop using, but can’t
BACK to: a+b  = 
Problems & Fantasizing …..

STAGES outlined
a. EXPERIMENTAL : non-addicted
Use a substance out of curiosity, peer pressure or rite of passage. No change in behavior or emotional reaction & is limited

b. SOCIAL :  pre-addicted
• The ‘use is part-of & acceptable in their social environment. They still consider the amount normal, & keep it only to those events

c. INSTRUMENTAL : early-addicted
• Substance starts being needed to cope with personal, work & social problems, as a substitute for facing & correcting them directly

d. COMPULSIVE : fully-addicted
• The substance is the person’s main preoccupation – how / where they can get more. Shame develops, so there’s a need to hide its use, & their life is negatively effected, spinning out of control.

⚠️ ⚠️ ⚠️

Characteristics of “DRY DRUNKS”
If an alcoholic stops drinking, they’re not sober, mental-health-wise. But then it’s early days. AA says: “It takes a drunk 5 years just to get their brain out of hock!” Then they can start growing up.
OR maybe – the person is a narcissist who resists self-reflection & so can’t mature emotionally, even though their life may improve in many other ways – which mainly shows up in personal relationships

Dry addicts are as angry as when they were still drinking. But instead of directing it at the effects of the substance, they often aim it at whoever forced a change, coming from: a spouse threatening to leave, a boss to fire them, or a judge to jail them…. unless they stopped drinking. Resentment can surfaces after a few weeks into the ‘honeymoon period’ of abstinence. Unchecked, it can lead to a resumption of drinking alcohol.  “The person I was – will drink again”.

The ‘dry drunk’ may sink into depression when beginning to see their life with a little clarity. While drinking, they may have though everything was OK. But sobriety can bring an awareness of age, missed opportunities, health problems & career failures. New expectations & demands are rarely welcomed, such as a promise to be monogamous, to babysit the children, to attend church or family gatherings, to do well at work….. Pretending to be happy about these changes is waring & can’t be kept up

Not ‘using’ doesn’t change the alcoholic’s basic impulsiveness , which usually involves doing things against their best interest. Even if the addict did want to stop drinking, it’s common for them to switch addictions. Irresponsible behaviors can be promiscuity, gambling, overeating…..
AND unfortunately, it can be ‘encouraged’ by still hanging out with the old crowd of bad influences, OR the family’s attitude : “As long as they’re not drinking, we don’t care what they’re doing”

Newly dry alcoholics often miss many opportunities provided by psychological maturity – not ready to handle a job, a healthy relationship, parenthood… Unlike their ‘grown-up’ peers, they’re still acting like irresponsible teenagers. They still demand immediate gratification, & when charm doesn’t get them what they want, they can become withdrawn, manipulative, passive-aggressive, complaining, attacking …..

NEXT: Alcoholism #2

Alcoholism – INTRO (#1a)



IMAGE:  “Overdose”,  designed & created by DMT (2017)

SITE: Brad Pitt, alcoholism 

The distinction between physical dependence & psychological addiction is  important. National Institute on Drug Abuse explains that physical dependence is  not by itself addiction – which is psychological & emotional.

Once the body is regularly used to a certain amount of alcohol – & then has to go without it for even a short time – withdrawal sets in. This is so painful that the alcoholic will resume drinking to avoid experiencing the distressing symptoms. The cycle continues unrestrained until some type of intervention occurs (self, legal, family….)(More….)

ADDICTION : A chronic brain disorder affecting a person’s sense of pleasure, motivation & memory. While there are psychological, biological, social & environmental factors that can play into it, a large part of the risk for addiction is genetic

Addiction is any obsessional thinking about & the compulsive need for – drugs, alcohol, food (sugar ), sexual activity (dopamine), fear (adrenalin), romantic ‘love‘ (dopamine), dangerous sports (adrenalin)….  despite the negative consequences acting on them will cause. It includes developing a tolerance, intense physical cravings, & withdrawal symptoms. This develops over time, starting with misuse, moving into abuse & resulting in addiction.

WHY: The more stressors we have to deal with, the more we search for solutions to alleviate suffering to feel better. Using substances to manage uncomfortable emotions & life problems is not about which ones a person chooses, but rather it represents a problem of impaired coping mechanisms – not learning how to solve issues in healthy ways.

Medically, alcoholism is referred to as Alcohol Use Disorder AUD – determined by 11 criteria in the DSM-V . In 2012, an estimated 7.2% of American adults 18 & older (about 17 mil.) had a diagnosable AUD.
Men are almost 2x more often substance abuser than women (11.2 mill vs. 5.7 mill). And teens are not immune. In that same year, an estimated 855 thousand young people (ages 12 to 17) also had this disorder.

The National Institute of Alcoholism & Alcohol Abuse (NIAAA)
🚦 🚥 TWO or more of the following symptom indicate AUD
a. Moderate (“Normal”): Per day – 1 drink for women, 2 for men
b. Binging: Any drinking that brings blood-alcohol level to 0.08 – women = 4, & men = 5, over a 2 hr. period
c. Heavy Use: Binge drinking episodes on 5 or more days in the past month

Mild: 2 -3 symptoms // Moderate: 4-5  // Severe: 6 or more
🚦 🚥 Only TWO (or more) of these symptom are needed to indicate AUD:

• Drank a larger amount or for longer than – you originally intended
• Spent an excessive amount of time drinking (many hours)
• Wanted to cut down or quit drinking, but were unable to

• Developed a tolerance to alcohol, or the need to drink larger amounts to get the desired effect
• Had a craving for alcohol when not drinking, or wanted a drink so badly you couldn’t think of anything else

• Often been physically sick as a result of time drinking – & it interfered with your ability to take care of your home & family, caused problems at work or in school
• When not drinking, had withdrawal symptoms (trouble sleeping, body tremors, nausea, sweating, or seizures….)

• Continued to drink in spite of external negative consequences (trouble with family, friends, work, the Law)
• Continued to drink in spite of internal negative results (depression, anxiety, worsening health problems, blackouts….)

• Cut back on or stopped participating in activities you once enjoyed because of your drinking
• Found yourself in dangerous situations many times – as a direct result of drinking, (driving, swimming, in dangerous areas, unsafe sex….)

An average functioning alcoholic can be identified as someone who:
✴︎ drinks alcohol to replace eating food
✴︎ has angry or defensive reactions when someone suggests alcoholism

✴︎ can’t remember what happened while under the influence
✴︎ sets drinking limits, but can’t stick to them

✴︎ does “pre-drinking” before an evening out
✴︎ tries to hide drinking from others

✴︎ drinks in the morning, through the day or while alone
✴︎ jokes about the possibility of being an alcoholic (More….)

➡️ SITE: “I’d drink to just about anything. Being a functional alcoholic is no fun at all”, writes Kristen Pyszczyk


MBTI : DOM / INF in Combination


PREVIOUS: Shadow #8 














Probability Search (PS) & Compatibility-Degree Matching, (CDM) were used to identify synthetic social networks, by assigning human Personality Types to the nodes, then adding links between nodes based on the compatibility of those Types (More….)



INFERIOR reaction BLOCKED by its DOMINANT Counterpart ⬇️ :

2 kinds of Perceiving:
a. Sensing
  – the ability to perceive details, & go for the fullest possible experience through the 5 senses
b. iNtuition – seeing the big picture, chasing the furthest reaches of the possible & the imaginative

2 kinds of Judging
a. Thinking – being objective & deductive, looking for rational order thru the impersonal logic of cause & effect
b. Feeling 
stepping in to the situation, being empathetic, & looking for rational order in accord with key values

 🗺 🗺 🗺

When a function is misused or misapplied, the person’ll have problems & setbacks. 

Se-Ni (SP): When well-aligned, you pursue goals assertively, & are great at working around minor setbacks or environmental obstacles

WEAKNESS: You enjoy things so much you forget to stop & plan stuff out

FAIL: When misaligned, you tend to overlook or misunderstand the deeper meaning & implications of events / behavior, prone to aimlessness or impulsivity, with harmful long-term consequences

Ne-Si (NP): When well-aligned, you’re able to carry out your good ideas, making progress in the world, very resourceful in turning around problems or setbacks

WEAKNESS: So many ideas, but you can’t just pick one, shut up & stick with it

FAIL: When misaligned, you tend to be too idealistic / impractical, very careless about details, sometimes too scatter-brained to succeed, or keep repeating same mistakes

Si-Ne (SJ): When well-aligned, you reliably carry out tasks & duties in a detailed, thorough way, knowing the best methods for handling & implementing logistics

So comfortable with routine but a new idea freaks you out

FAIL: When misaligned, you tend to be too stubborn, narrow-minded, or risk-averse, unable to discover new / better ways accomplishing goals, because you can only see / accept one pre-existing or ‘correct’ way

Ni-Se (NJ): When well-aligned, you have ambitious & lofty visions for self &/or the world, very focused in pursuing an ideal

WEAKNESS: Your head’s in the clouds so much, you forget to stop to enjoy things

FAIL: When misaligned, your vision is too limited, or you have unrealistic expectations, too blind to see what you’re chasing is not workable, or that won’t have a positive outcome (maybe blind to important external changes)

🦋 🦋 🦋

Te-Fi (TJ): When well-aligned, you’re determined & competent at setting goals & reaching them, very good at leading, & efficient at eliminating obstacles or solving problems

he facts are the facts are the facts  – & you don’t care if someone’s feelings get hurt

FAIL: When misaligned, you tend to be too hasty / aggressive in how you try achieving goals, believing the end justifies the means, even trampling over others

Fe-Ti (FJ): When well-aligned, you can accurately assess the needs of everyone involved, & very compassionate in how you resolve interpersonal problems or social issues

WEAKNESS: You want to make everyone happy even if it means ignoring giant internal problems

FAIL: When misaligned, you tend to be socially insecure/inept, easily misunderstanding others (even tho’ you believe you’re great at reading people). You try to influence social situations but choose ineffective strategies that are likely to blow up in your face later

Ti-Fe (TP): When well-aligned, you’re knowledgeable & self-sufficient when trouble-shooting problems, very skilled at resolving whatever issues come your way

WEAKNESS: You want to get to the bottom of what makes the world ‘tick’ & don’t care if it makes society freak out

FAIL: When misaligned, you tend to have poor judgment, worsening rather than solving problems, by being unable / unwilling to see (human) complexities, or by dismissing other people’s valid viewpoints

Fi-Te (FP): When well-aligned, you confidently influence the world to become more moral & just, very passionate about creating opportunities for everyone to flourish

You spend so much time in your own world, to the point that facts aren’t important to you

FAIL: When misaligned, your evaluations tend to be too self-centered / subjective, & you keep wasting time on futile action that get negative results – not knowing the best way to produce lasting change in the world.



MBTI : AUX-TERT Functions


PREVIOUS : Dom-Aux #2




The TERTIARY is needed for stress relief – if used in healthy way to give other overworked functions a break; as a general support for the AUX & for relaxation

Because the letter of this function is not part of our type, it represents characteristics that tends to be less interesting to us, so fewer of its skills get developed. It generally starts exerting its influence about midlife, & can then be used to guide toward areas of life that have been neglected or avoided, that require skills the person doesn’t feel comfortable using. So, a Thinking type with N-Tert could start taking a literature course & a Thinking type S-Tert might take carpentry or weaving classes…..

AUXILIARY can be negatively affected by an immature TERTIARY:

1 – Si or Ni dominant
Te-Fi (IxTJ) : If Fi-TERT interferes with Te-AUX, the person can concoct faulty moral reasons for why they should stick to their beliefs at all costs. The result is manipulative or unproductive behavior, causing self-inflicted disappointment & withdrawal.
They may seem individualistic or principled (mistaken for Fi-Dom), but it’s more like. narrow-mindedness, greatly oversimplifying moral issues into crude B & W judgments (the higher Te), to become self-serving & insensitive (unlike Fi-Dom).
Fe-Ti (IxFJ) : If Ti-TERT interferes with Fe-AUX, the person can concoct faulty logic reasoning, to neglect / ignore social roles or responsibilities. Their insecure or guarded behavior leads to self-inflicted unhappiness &/or loneliness.
They may seem knowledgeable or analytical, (mistaken for Ti-Dom), but it’s defensive, used to rationalize away mistakes & criticism, or mis-attribute blame (the higher Fe). This creates incoherent / contradictory thinking & cations (unlike Ti-Dom).

📈 📉
2 – Se or Ne dominant
Ti-Fe (ExTP) : If Fe-TERT interferes with Ti-AUX , the person can rationalize away their mistakes or bad behavior by twisting their perception of social interactions. They react by being thoughtless or devious, ending in self-inflicted isolation.
While they may seem sociable or charming, but has a calculating underside, treating others as tools / objects for self-centered gain (the higher Ti). This creates relationship failure & social discord (unlike Fe-Dom).
Fi-Te (ExFP) : If Te-TERT interferes with Fi-AUX, the person can get an immediate but superficial gratification, leading to immoral or destructive behavior, causing self-inflicted suffering.
They can be determined or commanding, but with a desperate bent. They’re more likely aggressive & controlling, to make up for an underlying sense of inadequacy, or to temporarily soothe emotional pain (the higher Fi). This results in unnecessary setbacks or unintended consequences (unlike Te-Dom).

📈 📉
3 – Ti or Fi dominant
Se-Ni (ISxP) : If Ni-TERT interferes with Se-AUX, the person can make excuses for why they can’t or won’t broaden their outlook. This causes short-sighted or over-simplistic judgments that lead to self-inflicted fatalism or self-defeating thinking.
They may seem serious or brooding, (mistaken for Ni-Dom), but it’s just superficial,  carelessly dismissing deeper meaning or potential for growth (the higher Se). So they have a dejected or cynical attitude about what’s possible in life (unlike Ni-Dom)
Ne-Si (INxP) : If Si-TERT interferes with Ne-AUX, the person can get stuck in their old comfort zones or rely only on past knowledge/experience. The result is doubting or stubborn judgments that lead to self-inflicted pessimism or stagnation.
They may seem reserved or proper, (mistaken for Si-Dom), but it has an obsessive undercurrent. They compulsively fuss over trivial details, misinterpret physical discomfort & irrationally magnify painful past experiences, (unlike Si-Dom) which gets projected as negative future possibilities (the higher Ne).

📈 📉
4 – Te or Fe dominant
Si-Ne (ESxJ) : If Ne-TERT interferes with Si-AUX the person can continually make excuses for very sloppy decision making, which ends either in disruptive or micro-managing behavior, causing self-inflicted discord & chaos.
They may seem humorous, positive or clever, (mistaken for Ne-Dom( but there’s a grandstanding element used to cover anxiety, or deflect criticism & mistakes (the higher Si). It ends up in bad ideas that fall flat or make situations worse (unlike Ne-Dom).
Ni-Se (ENxJ) : If Se-TERT interferes with Ni-AUX, the person can selectively only focus on what they wants to see, to justify unsound beliefs, leading to pointless or hasty action that cause self-inflicted failure or defeat.
It makes them seem fun or enthusiastic (mistaken for Se-Dom), but there’s an undercurrent of overreaction, which makes them irritable & retaliatory when reality crushes expectations (the higher Ni). They distort / overlook important realistic details, or react poorly to unexpected changes (unlike Se-Dom).(FROM: Type-spotting guide)


MBTI : DOM – AUX Functions (#2)



PREVIOUS: Dom/Aux #1



The AUXILIARY can be considered a bridge function that connects DOM with the lower half of the Stack (Tert & Inf)), which represents a more sustainable path to the expansion & integration of one’s type. In most cases, trying to integrate Dom & Inf without the help of AUX creates an either-or / tug-of-war energy, rather than a symbiotic one. This is because the psychological gulf may be too great without the 2nd & 3rd providing needed personality characteristics.

Also, AUX gives needed Extroversion energy for the Introvert, & provides an Introverted opportunity to process experiences for the Extrovert. Without that balance, a person’s life can become ‘unmanageable’.

EXP: If an Introvert doesn’t use their Extrovert AUX, they’ll just live in their head, imagining all the things they want to do, talking about them – endlessly, even make plans, but never actually DOing them.

💨 If an Extrovert ignores their I Aux, they’ll rush thru life taking actions without stopping to consider why, making messes even if their motives are good, ignoring consequences to others, the effect on their own physical & mental health ….

⛈ People who don’t use each function properly can become incompetent flakes who don’t do anything right (in the extreme, of course 🙁).
EXP: An Introvert who only relies on their DOM will start having unreal ideas of the world, while such an Extravert will be reckless & do thoughtless things….

DOM-AUXILIARY pairs at their MOST UNhealthy:

Te/Si and Si/Te (ESTJ or ISTJ) will completely lose sight of why they do & want the things they do & want, robotically going through the motions of life, checking off boxes, until they wake up one day to realize they’ve been miserable for the last 40 years

Se/Fi and Fi/Se (ESFP or ISFP) will be self-absorbed, caring only about their own experiences. They have a lot in common with ENTJ & INTJ, but those 2 types are more likely to bulldoze others into submission – making everyone hate them, while ESFP & ISFP will neglect people – making everyone just feel indifferent

Se/Ti and Ti/Se (ESTP or ISTP) will become so disconnected from society that their skills & knowledge will lose relevance, but blame everyone else for their problems

Fe/Si and Si/Fe (ESFJ or ISFJ) will be fake & smiley. They’ll do everything possible to keep up the APPEARANCE of having a solid personal life, then let off steam by talking trash behind people’s back. With an unhealthy ESFJ or ISFJ, one can never be sure íf they’re really your friend – or not

Ne/Ti and Ti/Ne (ENTP or INTP) will devil’s-advocate everything into oblivion, never committing to any opinions of their own

Ne/Fi and Fi/Ne (ENFP or INFP) will get trapped between their needs to consider everything vs making the absolute bestest decision, so become paralyzed

Te/Ni and Ni/Te (ENTJ or INTJ) will become very, very selfish, not considering others when pursuing their goals

Fe/Ni and Ni/Fe (ENFJ or INFJ) will view the world through B & W colored glasses, while thinking they know what’s best for everyone. In their own mind, they’re morally superior judges standing above an evil, lazy world. In reality – they are just TREMENDOUS jerks.









: DOM-AUX #2

MBTI : DOM-AUX Functions (#1)





The Dominant function needs the Auxiliary to stay balanced –  re decision-making and   action-taking.

Since the STACK is made up of our Type’s 2 center levels, it shows how we –should– gather new information (Perceiving – S or N), then process it & come to some conclusions (Judging – T or F), so we can make decisions that best suit our needs. That means someone with am E Dom will have an I as AUX to help, & vice versa.

To be psychologically healthy – mentally & emotionally – we all need to be able to move into action by paying attention to our outer world, AND to step back, pause & reflect on our experiences.  AUX’s  ‘nature’ is always different from, but is not antagonistic to, the DOM: either of the irrational functions (S/N) can be auxiliary to one of the rationals (T/F), & vice versa.

So Thinking & iNtuition can easily pair up, as can Thinking & Sensation, since neither N & S are by their nature opposed to the T function. Also, S can be bolstered by T or F auxiliary, F is supported by S or N, & N goes well with F or T.

EXPs: logical T succeeds with concrete S, speculative T forges ahead with imaginative N, artistic N can choose & present its ideas with the help of F-values, philosophical N systematizes its vision into comprehensive thought by a powerful T intellect …..
(from “General Description of the Types”)

NOTE: People who have not yet explored & developed their AUX may find it harder to identify their type. So, while an INJ may be confident about being an N type, without knowing their AUX they won’t be able to tell if they’re an INTJ or an INFJ.

Also, people ignoring their AUX will act very differently from those who incorporate it in daily living, although this may not always be deliberate, perhaps influenced by unconscious, environmental or other influences. (MORE…. )

✥ The following list & charts indicate the effect a HEALTHY Auxiliary will have:

With Si or Ni dominant:
Te-Fi (IxTJ): AUX Te can make an Introvert more competent & goal-oriented, to help quickly correct faulty thinking & irresponsible behavior when needed, for better results

Fe-Ti (IxFJ): AUX Fe can make an Introvert more sociable & compassionate, to help them better integrate into social situations, & accept feedback when change is useful 

With Ti or Fi dominant:
Se-Ni (ISxP): AUX Se can make an Introvert keen to explore new first-hand or hands-on experiences, to broaden their outlook on life & make better judgments 

Ne-Si (INxP): AUX Ne can make an Introvert keen to imagine new possibilities & make improvements to their life. 

🗝 🗝 🗝

Se or Ne dominant:
Ti-Fe (ExTP): AUX Ti can make an Extravert more analytical, to correctly calculate which decisions are most likely to produce beneficial results for everyone  

Fi-Te (ExFP): AUX Fi can make an Extravert more ethical & honorable in their decision-making, to avoid unhealthy behaviors that will sabotage themself 

With Te or Fe dominant:
Si-Ne (ESxJ): AUX Si can make an Extravert more careful & thorough in their approach to people/problems, to help manage situations more effectively

Ni-Se (ENxJ): AUX Ni can make an Extravert more nuanced & thoughtful in their approach people/problems, to help carry out their vision successfully
(FROM: Type-spotting guide)




MBTI – UNHEALTHY Functions (T / F)

PREVIOUS: Unhealthy  N

HEALTHY Ti: “Wait, have we checked everything? I wanna make sure it works

Ti types (ISTP / INTP) look for factual analysis – SO they can react very intensely confused or complicated situations
▪︎ They value being skilled & clear-headed, SO they’ll react against anyone they see as ignorant or irrational

Unhealthy Ti – those who think they’ve got it all figured out, yet results prove otherwise. They’re often cynical & smart-assed – & not in a fun way – criticizing & avoiding everything human – like emotions, unity, spirituality….
When Ti goes into “as long as I get when I want” mode, it’s aggressively manipulative, disregarding others’ feelings

ATTITUDE: “Well, it’s logical to me. I don’t care if it doesn’t work for others. They’re just emotional fools”

EXP: extremely skeptical, overanalyzes, obsessively searches for truth, harshly critical, outright rejects group institutions or norms

As unhealthy DOM
Ti: Think they’re the smartest, but can’t actually follow thru. They’d rather pick apart other people’s points endlessly, because they like to. They’re cynical & lack empathy – as an automatic defense to avoid their own emotional shortcomings

HEALTHY Te: “OK, so these are the steps to make this happen. If anyone objects or has a new idea, let me know, because that matters

Te types (ENTJ / ESTJ) look for rational expediency –  SO they can react intensely against ambiguous or disorderly situations
▪︎ They value efficiency & competency, SO they’ll react against anyone they see as lazy or incompetent

Unhealthy Te – those who want everyone to stick to the rules, but are often the first to break or twist them when it works in their favor. Any “sound advice” will be sprinkled with insults about others’ ability to problem-solve, even their entire character. Most frustrating is that when people finally have had enough of them, they just don’t understand why. In their opinion, they’re actually the only rational & responsible ones

ATTITUDE: “I don’t care if you like it or not. That’s how it’s gonna be”

EXP: aggressive, B & W thinking, inconsiderate of/rejects others’ feelings, need for control, need for dominance, ruthless

As unhealthy DOM
Te: Boss people around, shouts judgments & criticism. Harsh & often belittling everyone. Prone to deny mistakes & shifts blame onto others

HEALTHY Fi: “This is deep & personal to me. I want to live by it & lead by example

Fi types (ISFP / INFPlook for honor & integrity –  SO they can react intensely against unethical or infringing situations.
▪︎ They value being just & virtuous, SO they’ll react against anyone they see as callous or corrupt

Unhealthy Fi – masters at justifying everything they say & do. If all else fails, they’ll play the victim, loudly complaining that no one understands them. Their lives are often a disorganized mess, & please don’t offer them sound or logical advice, because that’ll really get them mad. They’ll gladly self-destruct even more – if it’ll get rid of you

ATTITUDE: “I don’t care if this hurts others. I’m gonna do it because it feels right”

EXP: excessively stubborn, hypersensitive, rejects objective decision-making, selfish, self-righteous, ‘special snowflake’ syndrome

As unhealthy DOM
Fi: Do & say whatever they please with total disregard for appropriateness – because that’s just “who they are”. Act irrationally, which they’ve mentally twisted into being the “right” thing to do. Refuse to take personal responsibility when things go south, since they’re convinced they were just being authentic & sticking to their guns

HEALTHY Fe: “I wanna make sure everyone’s OK with this. I win if we all win

Fe types (ESFJ / ENFJ) looks for social harmony –  SO they can react intensely against inequitable or contentious situations
▪︎ They value being considerate & respectful, SO they’ll react against anyone they see as selfish or impertinent

Unhealthy Fe – they know what everyone’s up to, believing they have an ‘uncanny knack’ for knowing what’s best for everyone else. They’re just trying to lift themselves up by knocking others down. This may be gossiping, or judging other’s behavior as if they wrote the “Etiquette” book.
Worst of all, they never seem to realize they can’t take care of themselves without a lot of help from others, which should be their top priority.

ATTITUDE: “If he’s not OK with this it’s HIS problem – the rest of us agree”

EXP: desperate for approval, emotionally volatile, manipulative, obsessed with social standing, rejects logical reasoning,  spineless, self-neglecting

As unhealthy DOM
Fe: Expect everyone to cater to them. Only want to hear what they want to hear. Sacrifice too much for others, then demand constant attention & validation. Publicly ostracize anyone they don’t feel an affinity with.

NEXT: DOM-AUX functions